Parenthood

 

Lord, thank you for the gift of children;

those born and raised in my family and those who I have the privilege of knowing and loving in other paths.  May I always remember to find the joy in their existence and the love and patience to reflect your love. 

Several years ago my daughter, Alex, was sitting in a college and preparedness high school class in which they were all to share their career aspirations.  

Considering that more than 80% of college students change their majors during college, the seriousness of the discussion was a bit laughable.  

Only then it wasn't laughable at all. 

When she spoke up that she wanted to be a mother, in addition to going to school, she was openly mocked by even her friends.

"You could help cure cancer and instead you are going to overburden the world population?"

"What a waste.  Why would you want to be stuck taking care of some kids?"

She came home disappointed in the views she had heard. 

Isn't it interesting that by obscuring the joy in child rearing Satan has so quickly been able to gain a foothold in the court of public opinion? 

Here is what I know.  If you list all of the hard or mundane tasks you will almost always be able to list more complaints than blessings. 

But what we fail to see is the WEIGHT of those blessings.  Yes,  diaper changes and laundry and packing bags for the babysitter or taking time off for a PT conference may seem  wearing.  If you don't like to cook, the expense and responsibility of them wanting to be fed EVERY MEAL EVERY DAY can also feel burdensome.

But when you see them scan the crowd from a school stage and catch your eyes and smile, or when their chubby little hands hold yours as they take their first steps,  or when your heart explodes with more love than you ever thought possible- the miracle and true blessings of parenthood overshadow the negatives in more ways than we could ever calculate. 

But only if we let God assign the weight, not the world who are using a skewed measurement.  

The joy doesn't come from a perfect social media post.  It doesn't come from a Mother's Day full of honor and ease.  Although those are nice if not always realistic, at least in my life.

The joy comes from making a difference.  From loving through the unlovable moments.  From giving a piece of yourself to them, hopefully with the support of a spouse and if not at least with the support of family and friends. And always with the guidance of Heaven. 

The joy comes from seeing the bigger picture and understanding that they are going to make mistakes and it's our job to guide them through them and teach them what to do when that happens.  

The joy comes from seeing them make good

choices amidst the bad, learning to serve and love and helping to guide those Spirits back home.

President Gordon B Hinckley promised, "Of all the joys of life, none other equals that of happy parenthood. Of all the responsibilities with which we struggle, none other is so serious. To rear children in an atmosphere of love, security, and faith is the most rewarding of all challenges. The good result from such efforts becomes life’s most satisfying compensation”.

The key he spoke of is happy parenting.  Mental health challenges, financial struggles and other difficulties including loss of a child can certainly make this charge more daunting, even heartbreaking.

But we have been promised that the Atonement of Jesus Christ will right all injustices.  

I once heard a comment that when we someday see our mortal parents without the cruel masks of mental illness and stress it will be a truly glorious day full of love, forgiveness and understanding.  That gives me hope for my weaker moments. 

In the meantime, as President Patricia P Pinegar encouraged, "Rejoice in your opportunities to love and care for the souls of children."

When we do that we can know we are doing better then we possibly imagined.  And we can reclaim the joy Heavenly Father has promised us when he said that "children are an heritage of the Lord".