What I Can Control

 


With wedding preparations in high gear this week, I have had lots of opportunities to watch and hear others as well as myself be very focused on how we will look.  

It's quite natural for an event such as this, but as I was bemoaning an extra rash on my cheeks this week, my good friend reminded me of this brilliant quote by Jeffrey R Holland. 

"I suppose no one is as handsome or as beautiful as he or she wishes, or as brilliant in school or as witty in speech or as wealthy as we would like, but in a world of varied talents and fortunes that we can’t always command, I think that makes even more attractive the qualities we can command—such qualities as thoughtfulness, patience, a kind word, and true delight in the accomplishment of another. These cost us nothing, and they can mean everything to the one who receives them."

There are certainly things which I would be wise to do to improve my physical self, but there are also many I don't have as much control over.  But I can always work (note the word requires effort!) at becoming more patient, kind and appreciative.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Trust

Image
  As I was riding a bike down the former train route along the Idaho-Montana border, I had hours to quietly reflect and appreciate the lush mountain landscape extending around me as far as I could see.   I was in a prayerful state, open to the promptings of the Spirit.   At one point I came to the edge of a meadow and needed to sit and rest for a bit.   There I found a lovely rustic bench made from a tree right there in the forest.  And it occurred to me how often the things we need are right there in our lives around us. The people, the resources, our talents and gifts. Psalm 34:8 lovingly promises “O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in him”. He will provide.   And as we learn to recognize that help, we will become more grateful and happy. 
Read more

Pancake Stirrers

Image
 Have you ever found yourself super upset over a rather simple offense? Generally when that happens it is actually due to much more than that incident.   It is likely just that incident that was the last straw, or used up your final bit of patience. Yesterday I had a student come to my room absolutely outraged.   She has a significant trauma history and so has learned to fight at all costs. Her counselors and our staff are working to help her build some new, more effective ways of dealing with frustration and confrontation. In this instance her role in her culinary arts class was to stir the pancake batter.   Only someone else did and her immediate reaction was to want to fight her. She knew that wasn’t appropriate so walked out and came to my room. After she had vented and calmed down, we talked through it.   Humor is a very effective tool for her so after gauging her body language I simply asked, “Are you going to let your whole day be ruined because someone else stirred the pancakes
Read more

Entitlement

Image
  As we stopped to get family donuts this morning, the sign in the restroom caught my eye. “Please be considerate of others and clean up any messes you may have left.” It reminded me of a sharp contrast I observed several years ago.  As a young class visited the restroom, a student balled up their paper towel and attempted to toss it into the trash can from across the room. He missed and went over to pick up the paper. His teacher immediately stopped him and commented, “Oh you don’t need to pick that up, that’s what we have janitors for.” What a missed opportunity. The child had naturally felt responsibility for his own actions and had tried to pick up his mess. Yet instead of helping cement that foundation of personal accountability, the teacher had reinforced entitlement and laziness. This same attitude is increasingly prevalent in society today.   It sounds like “Why should I have to?”, “Someone else will do it” or “It’s not my job”. Elder Dallin H Oaks stated, “The values of the wo
Read more