Better Than You Think

 

On one of my flights last week I was seated next to a little family with two daughters.

One was 18 months and one was 3. 

The 18 month old, like most toddlers, wanted to sit with whichever parent was currently not holding her and kept trying to dive back and forth across the aisle from her mom to her dad.  

The airplane only had an extra oxygen mask on one side so federal regulations said she had to  remain in place on that side.

Not understanding, and being very 18 months on the final leg of their journey, she was exhausted and cried for much of the flight.  

When mom and dad finally switched places so dad could hold her the three year old promptly fired up her lungs in protest.

She now wanted Mommy.

These loving parents tried food, books, toys, movies, games, songs and still their embarrassment and frustration with the public situation was palpable.

They kept apologizing to me and those around us.

We assured them we had all been there and that they were doing great.  

In the moment, they couldn't see all they were doing right.

Taking their kids to visit grandparents.

Lovingly reassuring them over and over again.

Patiently offering  them items when what they wanted and needed was a nap and the security of home.

What they hadn't seen, but I had, was while waiting to board as Dad sat on the floor and held his girls close and read them a story.

And how Mom had been gently rubbing one girls back and the other went around to her mom to rub her back too.

They are modeling love and killing it.

Sometimes we can feel only the embarrassment and frustration of where we fall short. 

Of how we perceive public response, whether accurate or not.  

Those feelings are real and discouraging.

Parenting is hard but the rewards are immeasurable. 

And we are usually doing better than we think. 

As Elder Holland promised, "To all mothers (parents in this situation) in every circumstance, including those who struggle—and all will—I say, “Be peaceful. Believe in God and yourself. You are doing better than you think you are. In fact, you are saviors on Mount Zion, and like the Master you follow, your love ‘never faileth.’"